The once insignificance, beckoned with purpose by the ever meandering yet consequential drive, has blossomed and un-become itself. Without loneliness, she only glimpses at the parted desperation that her self is not without stance, shadow, character. There were twenty-five men and women at the conference table and they were not uncivilized. Indeed, they were quite clever, intelligent, eager, and engaged: wit--yes, with far greater abilities, inductive and deductive abilities...far greater. The absolutes, regretably, do not present themselves as peer badges and principled spheres (for, of course, the sphere is quite divine). I was in elapse, embarrassed, cluttered. The once insignificance, by theoretical conjecture, is not undressed and at length discarded in the bathroom stall. No, it is a mark of the humanity, a mark of the life, a cherished addition to the feeble and awesome chance to witness, observe. Observe! Ah, she was shouting to no one, to me? no, no, to no one, to no one in the conference room. The rest, the others, were quite well composed and eager, eager to answer, with brilliance, with purpose, with messages. There is no witness to the life that is not granting significance, hope, duty--even the drab woman, the drab man, catches, snares, ha!, snares the glimpse of the colorful, the magnificient, the significant. There, as against the best of scientific inquiry, heading into storms without hats, gloves, coats, is the character, the truth tester, the unscientific, irrational, principle to exist: to exist!
At length, there were pauses in her eruptions, given time for the other sought men and women to interject to compose to build the sufficient connectors between past and present, between social and spiritual, between the ever living and the ever dying, between--yes, yes, the study to improve the ever lost, the ever forgetful....all that is the life, that is not ever challenging itself to be itself. Ah, the study, the inquiry--the evolved human mind has once, at last (in eager dismissal of the once insignificance) demanded importance of itself. So simple, so ever simple, the decay. A reason to eat herself! she yelled, long past out of breath and sweating and even--though unnoticed by her peers--bleeding.
Do you believe in god? He asks.
I believe the universe exists, she says. But she does not look at him. Not ever.