Exercise #2

Janine: Was I acting like an asshole for that conversation?

Stacey: I don't remember. You were like that all holiday season.

Janine: Every time we talked?

Stacey: Not every time.

Janine: And I said I was sorry. I was just fucking nuts, and I know it. But she didn't have to go on like that.

Stacey: She was thinking she could relate to you.

Janine: I know, she said, I just think of how it was when me and Carlos broke up, and then I multiply it by four thousand, and maybe that's a bit how you're feeling. But she doesn't even fucking know, you know? She can't. You don't know unless it happens to you. God forbid it does, to her, or you, or anyone.

Stacey: I know, she said because it's both like you're never going to see the person again. I mean, break ups are fucked up, even if they're mutual, they're so fucked. But with him, I mean, God...

Janine: She said, Gone is gone. But Carlos is still out there somewhere, you know? Fuck. I know I was wrong, but you got to admit: she was talking shit about him, saying oh you make him out like he was saint, but everyone makes mistakes, and he made big mistakes--

Stacey: What was she talking about?

Janine: I mean, he did what he had to do... you know... but come on, he wasn't fucking around, he was there for me, he had a good heart--

Carol: Watch your language.

Janine: Excuse me?

Carol: There are other people on this train.

Janine: Yeah, and they aren't saying anything, are they? Mind your fucking business.

Carol: It is my business when you're swearing and everyone can hear it

Janine: Well they why are you the only giving me shit? Anyway, what was I saying.

Stacey: I don't know.

Janine: Maybe I should just swear more.

Stacey: Yeah, totally.

Carol: You're a real bitch--

Janine: Oh my God, don't swear on the train! Everyone can hear! What the fuck is wrong with you?

Carol: You are, you're a bitch, and you're both spoiled brats.

Stacey: Excuse me?

Janine: Oh fuck you, mind your own business. I'll say it all I want. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

Stacey: What's wrong with her?

Janine: Yeah, you better move. Jesus. I forgot what I was saying.

You were saying how it isn't like the situation with Carlos at all.

Janine: Right, right... I mean, I know I was an asshole to her, but I just couldn't handle the way she was talking, like she could relate.

You can't unless it happens to you.

Janine: God forbid.

Though it will, unless you go first.

Janine: But she didn't have to talk shit. You got to admit, she was talking shit about him--

Stacey: I don't remember, really.

Mark: The thing is, I get the feeling she did it because of who they are. If they were black girls, she wouldn't have said anything.

I felt that way, too.

Mark: So it wasn't about decency then. It was fear. And that's a way bigger problem than these two taking advantage of the way things are.

Janine: It's been better since Christmas is over. But you know, it's still hard.

Stacey: I know, I mean, I can't imagine.

Mark: Or she needed to feel in control. And she sees these two white girls, and to her, they're not a threat. But if had been black girls, talking loud, swearing, you think she would tell them to keep their voices down? Have you ever seen anyone do that?

There have been times I wanted to say something, but didn't.

Mark: And sometimes I've even looked over at an older black woman, someone who looks like she could be their mother's age, and hoped that she'd say something.

Stacey: He had a real good heart.

Janine: I know.

Mark: Before they came on the train, I heard her say shut up, under her breath, when those women were talking in Chinese so loudly.

I heard it, too.

Janine: It's hard to relate.

Stacey: She was just trying though because she loves you.

Janine: I know. I'm sorry about everything I was saying. I didn't want to be an asshole.

No one does.

Mark: To me, it's all just noise anyway. You have to just filter it out, or else...

Janine: I miss him so much.

Stacey: I know. Gone is gone, but, you know...

It goes on.

Mark: And I'm getting off here. Hey, have a good fucking day.

Stacey: You move on.